I’m well aware that golf is the big show right now in the U.S., with the Masters taking center stage and the best of the best competing for the Green Jacket. The first major of the year has thrusted golf back into the national spotlight as normally Tiger Woods is able. Now such names as K.J. Choi, Trevor Immelman, Justin Rose and others get their chance to put themselves in the media spotlight, ala Zach Johnson in 2007.
So when Phil Mickelson talks about making golf an Olympic sport, it’s understandable that he’s caught up in the excitement of it all.But that doesn’t change the fact that having golf in the Olympics is as stupid an idea as you’ll find this side of Washington, D.C.
“We seem to be stagnant in growth. We lose as many golfers as we gain each year in the United States,” Mickelson said. “If we could make this an Olympic sport, I think golf could really grow.”
Good idea, Phil. Of course, if we waterboarded all non-golfers and forced them to play, golf could really grow, as well. It doesn’t make it a good idea, however. Head over to the Louvre one day and check out the statues of ancient Greek athletes. You’ll notice that very few of them depict naked guys holding a five iron with a caddie next to them checking the wind. By all means golf is a great game, but it’s just not Olympiad worthy.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for promoting stupid ideas. Hell, I picked Sergio Garcia to win the Masters. Twice. In fact, to make sure that my cornucopia of stupid ideas stays overflowing, how about this one - have a Golf Blogger competition in the Olympics. I mean, it would embody the spirit of the Olympics just as much as golf. Everyone on our Big List of Golf Blogs would be invited to participate. We could all get matching jackets and march with the American team. TV viewing would be scintillating, as cameras would focus on a group of guys sitting in their underwear and women sitting in their bathrobes hunt-and-pecking on the keyboard to produce quality golf blogs.
Yeah, this is a stupid idea worth pursuing. Mainly because I feel ultra confident I would win the Gold. In fact, I’d advise all other competitors to quit now, while the stupid idea is still in the stupid forming stage. Why have the embarrassment of losing when you could actually watch the action from home. Seriously, just quit now. You know who I’m talking to. Your blogs are worthless and weak.
Ok, sorry. I just got all caught up in the Olympic spirit. I see how it can affect people now. So I’ll forgive Mickelson for his enthusiasm. But golf in the Olympics is still a stupid idea and belongs in the Olympics just as much as golf blogging does.
Of course, golf blogging doesn’t have quite the corporate sponsorship that golf and the Olympics have. Gatorade, at very least, will spend billions on trying to get Tiger a gold medal so they can invent a new flavor of Gatorade Tiger.
So while golf in the Olympics is idiotic, we live in idiotic times. So look for golf to get a shot at the 2012 Olympics. Then at least the whole world will see how golf doesn’t belong anywhere near the Olympic games.
